More than Unbroken

Life gets real sometimes, and we have to address life before we can move forward. This is the raw, unfiltered Jill. I’m not asking for sympathy, but I know that part of what God has asked is that I be “undone” or unravel myself to the world. Expose the heartache and truth of my day-to-day struggles so that others can see that my journey is far from perfect. It’s messy, uncertain, emotional. But God told me to share. Expose it all. So I will obey. It’s been a hard week. If I’m being honest, it’s been a difficult few weeks. My anxiety levels have reached new heights as I’ve confronted what feels like attacks from every area in my life. As a teacher, life as I've known it has changed so drastically since COVID.  We are in the middle of it all, trying to adjust to what is expected and have more expectations laid upon us every week.  My husband is a funeral director, and, as the wife of someone who works in funeral services, I can assure you that COVID has completely changed his re...

Photo Credit: Chloe Alexis Photography It’s time for me to be vulnerable. Not for my own sake, but for others. Many of you may be surprised to learn that I have battled with depression and anxiety since my early twenties. I don’t share this information lightly or flippantly. The enemy has used my mind and emotions as a battlefield, and he has been relentless lately. I recognize the attack for what it is, and I feel it is necessary to shed light on mental health and how I personally have been able to overcome the struggles I have faced in staying emotionally and mentally well. My journey into the darkness was not overnight. Step by step, I ventured into a place within myself where I believed the lies of the enemy that I was worthless, a burden to my family, and that the world would be a better place without my existence. Fortunately, God put people into my life, including my amazing husband, to counter-attack before I learned how to fight for myself. But I have experienced the hopelessn...

 Admittedly, when God gave me this message, I felt so strongly it was a spoken word. Maybe one day I will be able to speak on this subject better than my meager attempt here.  However, I moved ahead and uploaded the story of Esther (see blog post  Obedience Observed ), which was a part of that message.  The truth is I could spend several weeks discussing heroes of the faith who obeyed God and saw amazing things happen. But how is that relevant to you and me now? Looking back at what God has done is important because it shows us that He is working in every part of our lives. Even before we existed, God was working and moving in the lives of men and women who chose to submit and obey.  Because of their obedience, they saw one victory after another.  We should look back at what God has done in our lives, too.  Look for all the ways He has blessed us. The unfortunate side of these stories is when these same people who saw victory forgot about it. They turn...

When you think of the story of Gideon, typically images of a mighty warrior come to mind.  Well, if you take a closer look, Gideon had quite the inferiority complex.  I can totally relate.  My sister actually reminded me of this Old Testament hero when I felt the tug of this ministry.  I was frightened because I didn't know what to expect or where to begin.  Gideon had issues of feeling "less than" much like me. 11 Then the angel of the Lord came and sat beneath the great tree at Ophrah, which belonged to Joash of the clan of Abiezer. Gideon son of Joash was threshing wheat at the bottom of a winepress to hide the grain from the Midianites. 12 The angel of the Lord appeared to him and said, “Mighty hero, the Lord is with you!”  13“Sir,” Gideon replied, “if the Lord is with us, why has all this happened to us? And where are all the miracles our ancestors told us about? Didn’t they say, ‘The Lord brought us up out of Egypt’? But now the Lord has abandoned us ...