More than Unbroken

It's been two months since the unexpected death of my Daddy. To say I have lacked the inspiration or even the motivation to write would be a tremendous understatement. The process of grief is slow sometimes, and this loss is particularly difficult because of a complicated past with my dad. As I reach for the words to express my thoughts, I am reminded of the truth of God's word. But You, O God, do see trouble and grief...You are the helper of the fatherless. (Psalm 10:14) I am far from feeling abandoned by God, even in my sadness. If anything, this season has reminded me of His faithfulness through the years that Daddy and I struggled to have a positive relationship. But time and again, God's word reminds us that He is a source of comfort and help to the orphan and the fatherless. So today, as fathers are recognized, I honor my Heavenly Father. He continues to carry me through the days when I am too weak or tired to even hold myself together. I remember the life of my Daddy...

 Dear readers, I wanted to express my heartfelt gratitude for the calls, texts, and, most importantly, the prayers over the last two weeks as my family and I have worked to process through the unexpected loss of my father.  Grief and loss are the reality of our fallen world, and I’m thankful for the God of peace and comfort who has so lovingly wrapped me up through every season, including this one. With this in mind, I find it necessary to take some time to lean into the presence of God. I have decided to take a brief hiatus on the blog as I continue to work through the overwhelming process of grief in a healthy way. An empty cup has nothing to pour out, and right now, my mind and heart are still trying to catch up with reality. I hope you can find encouragement in some of my past posts. My story isn’t over, so I will see you back on the blog soon. And it is all for God’s glory. Smiles, Jill

This is one of the most difficult pieces to write. My dad, Steve, passed away this morning unexpectedly. He was the “Music Man” in my world who made life a song.  Daddy was responsible for putting me on the stage. At two years old, he stood me on the altar at church so everyone could watch me sing “Victory in Jesus.”   At twelve, he was teaching me how to set up equipment and mix sound. As a teenager, we wrote songs together. His love of music is so deeply ingrained in me that I feel a piece of that is somehow missing now. Things were not always great between me and Daddy. In fact, we went for a long time without having contact with one another. I’m so grateful that God restored our relationship in his final years. Neither one of us were perfect in our relationship, but I always loved him deeply. So today, I’m heartbroken. Memories are flooding my mind, and there are so many things I still wanted us to share. I know the coming days will be filled with waves of grief and the st...

Lately, I’m having to remind myself of this phrase a lot! Call it what you want, but I know spiritual attacks come in all shapes and forms. In moments of chaos, I ask myself how Christ would respond. Trust me, I’m a work in progress! But every now and then, God reveals something about His character that I can show. Case in point: right now, I’m reading through the book of Deuteronomy with Bible Recap on the Bible App. This particular study has brought formerly mundane scriptures to life in a meaningful way. And God definitely has His hands full trying to keep the wandering Israelites on track! I can totally relate. All I have to say is it’s a good thing God didn’t put me in charge! My flesh gets the best of me and my emotions wreck me and those around me. This week, I had such a moment (or several, if I’m honest). When I was praying and asking God to help me handle a particular issue, He reminded me of the servanthood of Jesus. He washed feet. He knew He was being betrayed. He knew his...

 Knowing that God has been on the move in my life, it was no surprise that this week has been full of spiritual attacks. Physically, emotionally, and mentally the enemy took full advantage of my recent comfort. The joke, however, is on him. When my heart grows heavy and my mind fills with doubt, I turn to the One who whispers the truth.  Don't get me wrong. I spent a solid afternoon in bed one day this week after battling sickness in my body. I would hardly call that time "sacred." But when I look back at every moment that felt like a gut punch, I can see it for what it truly is. And then I can lean into Jesus. Some days this week it took all of my strength to whisper His name and ask for help. It was even harder to hear Him through the unrelenting lies playing through my mind. I have to press in and dig my heels in to stand firmly on Christ the solid rock. If I'm being honest, the lies are still playing like a broken record. But I refuse to live in defeat. Instead, I...

This weekend, I had the humbling, beautiful experience of joining with other women in our area to network and fellowship. Northside is hosting a conference this year, and one of the things God has laid on my heart is our need as the Church to break walls to build the body. Consider the Jews after Christ ascended. They couldn't keep the hope and joy God had provided to themselves. Instead, they took Jesus at His word. "Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age." (Matthew 28: 19-20) The fact is that the building you serve in and worship in is NOT the Church. If your pastor is preaching this gospel, YOU are the Church. I wonder if we still take this commission seriously. It becomes so easy to think that our pastors, missionaries, and other workers in mini...

  In 2020, we all began experiencing unprecedented change and loss. Since then, our friends and family have walked through multiple losses. Some were so gut-wrenching that it seemed impossible to carry on without the loved one. Others were a long time coming and resulted in a reluctant, collective sigh because we know that our loved one is no longer suffering. They are free from pain and heartache with our Lord in Heaven. Still, we have to go on without them. Grief and loss were never part of the plan. God created a perfect, beautiful world and longed for us to be in constant closeness with Him and each other. Enter Satan. The accuser of the brethren. The enemy of God. The destroyer of souls. See, this fallen angel, Lucifer, had a notion that he could be like God. When that plan didn't work, God cast him out of Heaven along with his followers. Ever since then, Satan has been working tirelessly to thwart God's plan for creation. It all started with a bite. When Adam and Eve chos...