Skip to main content

Admitting Defeat


I knew it was coming. Physically, my body began manifesting signs of it before my mind would give in. The tired, achy bones seemed to overwhelm me. Yet, things had to be done. If only I could make it to the end of August. September. October. Then I would have some relief. What can I say? I’m a glutton for punishment.

The fact is, I quit teaching theatre over the summer so I could focus more on my family. Unfortunately, for nine years, I have been used to busyness during the fall season. Despite everything I walked away from, I found myself with more to do. I proceeded to fill my proverbial plate with things that were easily justified as family-focused. The problem is that my family wasn’t my focus.

It happens quite easily. We see things that are important. The world needs to be fixed. And we know just how to fix everything (and sometimes everyone!). How so very simple it is for the enemy to slither in and whisper that things outside of the home matter more than what happens inside our home. And, once again, I have become prey to it.

From the ends of the earth, I cry to you for help when my heart is overwhelmed. Lead me to the towering rock of safety, (Psalms‬ ‭61‬:‭2‬ ‭NLT‬‬)

I love this verse. It’s such a gentle reminder that I can cry out to the One who shelters me in safety. I’m so thankful that God doesn’t judge me for overwhelming myself! I’d never earn His rescue. But He knows my anxious heart. He sees my deepest longings. He listens for my cry.

So today, I admit that I, in and of myself, am defeated. This isn’t to say that I am living in defeat. Rather, I am crying out to the Savior who comes to my rescue when I once again seek the shelter of His embrace. Admitting defeat isn’t necessarily weakness. What you do in that defeat is what matters most. For me, I cling to my “towering rock of safety.” This is the only way I will survive. Admittedly defeated. Abundantly victorious.

© Jill Cook and Unbroken & Undone Ministries.  All rights reserved.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Feelings and Faith

Vulnerable moment: it’s been a crazy week. If I’m being honest, the last six months or more have been wrought with uncertainty and so many questions within myself about my purpose.  I’ve been in a season of transition in our family with adapting to having an independent adult child and an independent teenage son-both of whom are thriving. So my purpose as a mom has shifted into steadfast support and guidance from a distance rather than rushing to the rescue, which I know is where we should be with them. This shift has adjusted our marriage. Lyndon and I are both learning how to navigate this new territory, and I’m so grateful we have each other.  My Daddy died suddenly last year, and I am still grieving the unexpected loss and what could have been. Grief is a strange journey and differs for everyone. What I know is Christ gives me the most profound peace when I feel my turbulent heart trying to sway me. But it certainly is a sadness that is layered. Because of these major life...
Post a Comment
Read more

He’s Already Heard My Prayer

This is one of the most difficult pieces to write. My dad, Steve, passed away this morning unexpectedly. He was the “Music Man” in my world who made life a song.  Daddy was responsible for putting me on the stage. At two years old, he stood me on the altar at church so everyone could watch me sing “Victory in Jesus.”   At twelve, he was teaching me how to set up equipment and mix sound. As a teenager, we wrote songs together. His love of music is so deeply ingrained in me that I feel a piece of that is somehow missing now. Things were not always great between me and Daddy. In fact, we went for a long time without having contact with one another. I’m so grateful that God restored our relationship in his final years. Neither one of us were perfect in our relationship, but I always loved him deeply. So today, I’m heartbroken. Memories are flooding my mind, and there are so many things I still wanted us to share. I know the coming days will be filled with waves of grief and the st...
Post a Comment
Read more

Five Favorite Things

  With Valentine's Day coming up, I've been thinking about the "stuff" that I really like. Flowers are great, and jewelry is nice. But if you want a friend gift or something a little more unique, here are a few ideas. Perhaps this post will help you shop for the perfect gift that will become a "favorite thing." For the Music Lover If you are purchasing for a musician or vocalist, you have a ton of options including a guitar pick necklace or keyring to tickets for a concert. Even vintage gifts like records have made a strong comeback in the music community. Things to consider when purchasing for your musical genius: what is their favorite genre? Who is their favorite artist? Before buying that album, make sure they don't already have it. For the Teacher I can tell you most assuredly what many teachers DON'T need: another mug. Even though this seems like a simple, cute gift, as a teacher, I have difficulty parting with any gift from students. I have ...
Post a Comment
Read more